What does the First Lady do in the woods at night?

Well you'll be pleased to hear that unlike bears, the First Lady did not sh*t in the woods this evening! And before any confusion strikes I am not talking about Mrs Obama but myself, the official First Lady of Jerry's night runs... the first Lady of the Night.... wait that can't be right either.


Start of the Night Run
The meeting point was 8pm in Shoreham car park, it was already dark and we'd seen many a trick or treater out and about as we departed Orpington. There were 8 of us in total with an arrangement to meet Richard at a slightly later point a couple of miles into the run.
Leaving the car park, it seemed like the men had (and I'm sure it was coincidental) a protective circle around me, I'm sure this is what the real first lady would have should she go out for a run, a bunch a security types surrounding her as she ran although perhaps not all in high vis with torches on their foreheads. This slight feeling of celebrity status to the running style made me feel more confident about the run. I knew these guys wouldn't leave me behind.
Jerry [pointed to some fireworks that seemed miles away and declared that's where we're going. It always seems impossible but we always make it!


Halfway Point and Pub Break
A mix of Orpies and PWRs we wound our way through fields, over styles, past the sleeping 'Badgers' in the field and on towards our first stop at about 5 miles. The pub that time forgot...'Rising Sun' in Kemsing. From the outside a lovely picturesque country pub. On the inside a peculiar murky cave like dwelling for two odd horders , with a parrot and kittens for sales (all of them pure black no doubt). We bought out drinks, no doubt doubling their takings for the month, we chatted and stared at our surroundings in awe and bemusement. Before we left I though a trip to the 'LOOS' as is order, I walked through the bar which then seemed to turn into a living room where a 'hills have eyes' type man was watching a 14" very fuzzy TV which I had just walked in front of. Lucky I had my head torch on as there were no lights or switches anywhere, I made it back alive to the others. I noticed on the bar a notepad with all their takings written down, Wednesday's taking were poor at under £9 with 3 drinks served - how do they stay open. It may the pub that not only time but the tax man and health inspectors forgot!


The Return Journey
After leaving the pub I started to feel a little queasy, seemingly the landlady with may have slipped me some witches brew before we departed. after about a mile or so into the true I dropped behind and was a little bit poorly sick in the bushes. I caught back up with the group and Jerry instructed everyone to take it easy - having a lady along is not all its cracked up to be. Feeling a little better and getting up some pace on the downhills I started to improve, this didn't last for long as we reached Otford I was feeling iffy again. We said good bye to Richard and then the group were hotfooting it back to Shoreham before last orders. Duncan then became my personal saviour as I soldiered on as he stuck with me offering me fruit pastilles intermittently. We had a slighlty scary moment as a bunch of cows started running frantically in a field as one got spooked by us, then leapt on another which was laying down then they all started galloping (as cows are known for). Duncan reassured me they weren't coming in our direction but it was enough f0r me to put in a momentary sprint towards the next style.



Last Orders
We made it to Shoreham and with puppy dog eyes they all looked at me and said if you are feeling poorly we don't have to go to the pub we could go straight back. It was time to man up, so off to the pub we went. As we entered a girl spotted Duncan's Petts Wood Runners vest and declared that she too was from Petts Wood! We all had a drink and lots of crisps before heading home. We passed crazy Orpie Brian as he ran back home again (making his run this evening at least a marathon distance!
Jerry dropped me home just before midnight avoiding the fatal pumpkin transformation and I was soon sparko. What a great night, lets hope I can make the next one without being ill - maybe I should avoid taking poisoned apples from wizened old ladies?!